Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Here's a joke The Holocaust.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the underaged man say when he walked in the bar? He asked for a Coke.

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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