Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Wait! hundred billions!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a gay man in a wheelchair? Nothing, his life is already hard enough and bullying him will only make the problem worse.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why is this the best day of 10 year old Johnny's life? His parents were killed in 9/11, and Osama Bin Laden has been found and killed. What, Too soon?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

thumb_up thumb_down -19

You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops