'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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What do you call a lot of goose in one place? geese

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

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Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Jellybeans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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