- Anti Joke

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

Why was the kindergartener crying in the corner? His family was poor and his father abused him.

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

what do you call a Mexican driving a plane? a pilot you were probably to racist to work that out

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops