Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

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A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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whats funnier than 24?????????????????????????????????????????? 25

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A man walked into his house He saw his wife having an affair with his teenage Gardner

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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You idiot thats 9 letters

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

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Why was the dog crying? Do dogs even cry?

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad at poetry Potato

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It's okay, I got the yogurt.

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When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

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what did the slave say to the slave owner i like your car

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shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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A man was walking down the street He was then killed in a drive by.

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops