If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

Knock knock, Who's th- IMA FIRIN' MA LAZOR

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

knock knok whos there? Jacob Jacob who? U know, your friend!

Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...