What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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What's the capital of Hungary? Thirtsy

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

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What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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A male paltypus usually possesses two poisonous goads under his forelegs. Which makes him potentially more dangerous than a dragon.

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roses are red grass is green your little ugly a*s makes me wanna scream

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

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If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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A man walks into a bar at 1 in the afternoon. He's the bartender and a fellow employee asked him to cover the afternoon shift.

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roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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black people

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Whats the difference between a falcon and a deer? both live in water, except for the falcon... oh, and the deer.

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Q: What did the black man say to the other black man? A: Nothing. They didn't know each other.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

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What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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