What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

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A man walks around a bar.

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A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops