why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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What did the rainbow sun say to the flower-faced elephant? "Want some tea and hamsters?" I'm addicted to acid.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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hi hi strager danger

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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What?

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

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How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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