Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

Barbara Streisand

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

what is the world worst joke? this one

Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

Why don't you throw a rock at a Mexican on a bike? Because depending on the size of the rock, you could seriously injure him.

Black people

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

the little boy got in a ice cream truck he cant sit down anymore

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

Why did Jimmy fall out of the tree. Cause' I shot him.

What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

The joke below was so funny I forgot to laugh.

Why wasn't the man wearing a life vest? Because he was sleeping.

I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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