Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

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What do you call a Rhino and a Lion having sex? Pointless, since they can't reproduce

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why did i write this joke? Because i'm a try hard.

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why did the walrus sex with the jew because 911 created a sexual falafel

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I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

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Today, my doctor discovered I had a tumor in my brain the size of a walnut. FML.

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Q: What's worst than the Holocaust? A: 6 million Jews

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A blonde girl walks into a car.

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What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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Patient: Doctor Doctor I think I have HIV! Doctor: Wtf to that one...

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing set? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 5 dollars he would have 10 dollars

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Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

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Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I. I who? I broke my dick.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

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What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

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I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops