A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

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What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

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What's beauitful and disgusting at the same time? Menstration. Jk it's just disgusting.

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What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

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How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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