Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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A Man Walks into a Bar with a Dog. He is blind, and is promptly guided to his seat by other patrons.

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justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

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Whats worse than a joke? This

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How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

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how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

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Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

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When I get aroused I get a solid snake

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What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

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Guess what I saw today? Everything I looked at.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally becase she fell off the swing.

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knock knock whos there? jim okay come in.

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do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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hickory dickory dock no one cares

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Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

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Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops