I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

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What's a foot long and slippery A dick

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Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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Get on your knees Ho

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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69- by Adam Chebali

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Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

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What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

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Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam were having dinner together at a local restaurant. Which caused a group of Republicans sitting nearby to ask for another table.

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Jim came home from work. only to find out his family had been murdered

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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what's more fun then stapling a dead baby to a fence? ripping it off

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Jake was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. His wife looks down and sees a scale.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police your son died in a car crash.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

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How do you kill a bolonde? You have her/him do an algebra problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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