Whats long, hard, and filled with seaman... a mans penis

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the frog order at McDonalds? Nothing, it's a frog.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Politics

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the kid drop his ice cream? because he got ran over by a bus! (not a original, just funny)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

"My grandmother has AIDS. They are really nice ladies." -joke by comedian Daniel Cupps

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock . . . I'm coming in!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the black man in prison? He was wrongly accused of a felony and the jury by whom he was tried was largely racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock! Who's there? A bottle of beer. No thanks, I've been sober for 15 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats wors than getting hit by a car? getting raped by a giant scorpian

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock who's there a tiger Alex proceeds to walk away as there is a tiger at his front door. he then calls the police because of the potential danger. the animal control then apprehends the animal and takes it to an enclosure

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why shouldn't you worry about having a baby? Because with all these jokes, babies aren't even going to be around anymore. "What's funnier than a dead baby?" "A dead baby in a clown costume"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between Rob Schnieder and Jelly Beans? Someone besides Adam Sandler likes Jelly Beans.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

YOUR MOM SHOT YOU OUT HER ASS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops