how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the Asian guy dumped by his hot girlfriend? Well you know what they say about Asian guys.... They are too dedicated to their schoolwork.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the sign say? It said slow down

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There are two men named Dan. The first man says, "Hello, my name is Dan." The second man says, "Hello, my name is also Dan."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If the opposite of Pro is Con, whats the opposite of progress?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two Irish men walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops