Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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Miley Cyrus.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

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Why did the policeman arrest the black man? He had commited a crime and murdered somebody.

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How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

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Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

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the other day i saw a mouse run across my floor. i said "okay" and proceeded with my life

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Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

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Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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So you there Red?

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

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A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

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Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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boobs

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The Olympics

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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