What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What mouse walks on 2 legs, Micky mouse. What duck walks on 2 legs, All ducks you dip shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock! Ding dong.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

TIMMAH!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why are black people so tall? Because their parents were

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Kathy Griffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A Boy Walks Up To A Frog At the Bus Stop And Says, “Why Are You So Upset?” And The Frog Replied, “I’m Waiting For The Bus Because My Car Just Got TOAD!”

thumb_up thumb_down +23

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down the hill. what black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I dont hate you Lets just say if you were on fire and i had water id drink it

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Joe used to always talk about his family and his two wonderful kids Joe can no longer talk to or about his family because his smoking habits have gotten out of control

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many times can the Frenchman cheat on his wife? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you get a n***r out of a tree? Cut the rope

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats your moms inside look like nick because all there is is fat

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops