After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

I can see you under there. Under what?

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

You might be redneck if you are... Indian

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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