Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

what sucks? things that suck

America

Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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