And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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What did the boy to it's grandad........ UR COuSIN¬

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What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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Q. What happened when a man went to a bar? A. Nothing, The bar was closed.

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

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someone called a frog a frog

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Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

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Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the Irishman walk out of the bar? He didn't. He's Irish

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Whats 9+10? 19

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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