How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, they already stole them all.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

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what's the difference between a black man and a lift? both can raise babies, a part from the black man

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

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A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

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What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Look at that bitches asss!!

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How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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say this really fast D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I CK, D I C K IF YOU CANT LIKE IT

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why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

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What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

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What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

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What god did Bill believe in? No god, Bill is an athiest

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What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

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You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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