a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

thumb_up thumb_down +34

why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

What never seems to get old? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

^that joke's not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +51

whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

obamas trench

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Yo mama is so hairy, because she's arab.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

thumb_up thumb_down -31

When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops