knock, knock who's there? I'm here to kill u! I'm here to kill u who? .......

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree, He was dead

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

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womens rights to vote

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mothers funeral.

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Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho Cheese! Anti Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Sally's Cheese

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Whats not green and cant pee? Not a pea!

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh sh*t the gardens on fire

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how do you kill a little girl? seeing as murder is a federal offence i will not tell you how. you should be ashamed for asking.

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What do you call a black man running with a TV? A hard working individual who is in a rush to watch his new TV that he bought.

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Why did Edna fall off a cliff? Edna is blind, and so lacks the visual perception and spatial awareness of other hillwalkers.

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which sex position produces the ugliest children? go ask ur mom

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What do you call a feline attempting surgery? A catastrophe, because they aren't very good surgeons.

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What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

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Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

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why dont we just take bikini bottom and push it somewhere else

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Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

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What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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