Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

whats a dick a dick

A Jewish guy walked into a bar... and said "ow"

What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

a guy jumped out of a plane...he died

Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

if life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians

Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

Why did the dog kill the fish? He had no reason, he just wanted fish. What, you thought he had like, a vendetta? pssh your crazy

Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

what do trees and humans have in common? they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

Roses are red Violets are red Oh sh*t the gardens on fire

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

What do you call a feline attempting surgery? A catastrophe, because they aren't very good surgeons.

when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand hey! Got any guns

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's wet.

What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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