A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

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How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

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two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

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Comedy.

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why did the puppy poop? he had too

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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Have you heard the one about the Norwegian? He killed 98 people.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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A: B: No pun intended.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

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Why do jews have long noses? Because they received the genetic alleles from their parents that cause the nose to grow longer.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did a second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did a third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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poop

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Wanna know something fishy? A fish

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Who's There? A: I Am...

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

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A baby seal walks into a club.... Oh....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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