Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

A Jew walks into a bar The bar owner looks at a gang of punks in the back and shouts "YOU! GET OUT!" The Jew leaves the bar.

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

A women president

So I was eating pancakes in my driveway...or were they waffles?

Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

JLo made a song about my diick- "On the Floor"

What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

Silly Sally Dillydallied then lost her job to outsourcing.

Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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