An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did Chad find dead people all over the playground? Ask him, it's not like he's pointing a gun at your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Two penguins were taking a bath. One said "pass the soap." The second penguin replied, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Betty Whites ALIVE?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Keep up the fun Nero!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops