why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

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Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

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knock knock who's there police

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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There's a pair of siamese twins.....One of them's gay.

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Weiner

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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Where is Madeline McCann? 6 Feet under....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

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Wanna know who doesnt no how to right a joke? Who ever wrote this...

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops