What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

thumb_up thumb_down +24

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

There women are stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a Muslim running a country? Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The man with a long history of Alzheimer's once said: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cheese n' toast

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Gianni

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Obamacare haters

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because eating raw chicken is just wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse than The Holocaust? TEN HOLOCAUSTS!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Can you get me a stapler,make sure it has staples because if it doesn't..........I won't be a ble to staple anything

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why could the boy not stop shaking? He has Parkinsons Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

gdfhtrfcgsexdfchrthgdfggfhtdtfhdtyfgfdfcghfgdyghhyrtfgrdfdffdtgdfgfghrthfg Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A depressed gay illegal immigrant walks into a bar and the bartender asks why he's sad. The man replies "I'm the most unwanted man in America."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops