A guy in a truck delivering furniture runs over a frog. Concerned for the frog, he pulls over and runs back to the frog and asks "Are you ok?" The frog replies "Yeah, you want to buy a cupboard?"

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Whats the difference between the black man and the white man? The black man was born with more melanin the pigment in there skin, which would concur the black man did have darker skin. Also, the white man had cancer.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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Fuzzy Whuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Whuzzy has no hair. Fuzzy Whuzzy has Cancer.

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What is an Anti-Joke? This is.

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What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

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A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

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What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

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How much does a polar bear way? Near 1,100 pounds.

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How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

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Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

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Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

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how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

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Q: What is the difference between everything and nothing? A: everything! Moral: NOTHING!

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Why couldn't the 1 year old talk? It's a 1 year old, idiot, it can't!

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two biscuits rolling down a hill one says, " where you from" the other replied "im not telling you, youl steal my washing"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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