"Hey Jeff, how are you?" "Yes."

how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

Why did the airplane crash? It was hit by a flying refrigerator.

What happens when you drop the soap in Prison? You pick it back up and go about your business.

Four Iraqis played hide and seek 17 years ago, one of them missing, why? he's still hiding.

Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get hit by a car

Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

a man walks into a bar....... thats it.

What happens when you try to hand feed a shark You have one less hand

who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

My life :(

Q: What has 1 eye and half of a pig's snout? A: A pig peeking around a corner.

Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

How do you stop a car? Put on the Brake

How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

What's the same about eggnog and a computer? You can search the web. Except that's only true for one of them.

You wanna hear a JOKE ?!! Justin Bieber has a DlCK !!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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