How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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What did the mexican get for his brthday? A potatoe

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

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Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

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you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

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Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff? Because after twenty long years of monotonous nagging, he finally snapped.

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Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

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Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

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What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

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What did the fat girl say to her friend? I'm fat.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

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What is the best thing about chuck norris? hes holding a gun to my hea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops