What happend when 1 second past after 7:00 am? It was still 7:00 am.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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Roar, roar! I am the king of the jungle! But did you know the lion would be defeated by a polar bear in a battle between the two?

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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conrad profit

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I saw a mexican drowning and saved him... as my screensaver ;)

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

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What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

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What is Worse than the holocaust?

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

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Knock knock Come In.......

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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