What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

There are 263 birds on a fence, a farmer shot 1 how many are left? 0 the rest flew away.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

My nieghbor is blonde, but she doesnt like corn dogs or anything of that sort because her boyfriend is mexican. Mexcans are banned from eating corn dogs because they illegally crossed the border. Her dog wieghs about 8.9485763 pounds. Her nieghbor also protests corndogs because she cant fit throught her customized door which was 39 feet long. Why was six afraid of seven? because that lady is 700 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A: Knock knock. B: <>

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

What's wrong with shooting an african american? Everything, it's murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Halo < COD

thumb_up thumb_down +59

if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

thumb_up thumb_down +53

When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

without laughing try to say " i hate bubble" with a dull face

thumb_up thumb_down +51

this sentence will not monkey banana pie

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +47

:O + :P = 69

thumb_up thumb_down +47

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops