Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why are niggers afraid of the dark ? because they think that darkness is the only black thing there

thumb_up thumb_down +15

how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Do you need any assistance?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yes. Just Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the man do with his bread He ate it

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I went to a hockey game and the strangest thing happened; 2 players got into a fight!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the funniest part about this site? You're alone and reading this joke instead of getting a date.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops