Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

how do you kill jesus? with a knife

what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

save water shower with friends

How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They moved the furniture.

2

Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

only downer about having sex in the dark is........................ when u look out window and guy u thought u were sleeping with waving and laugh

The Charlotte bobcats.

Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

I can Nazi

can't wait until the baby boomers die

What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

What is the difference between a baby and a rat? I don't have a rat in a cage

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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