What did the priest get for Christmas? Herpes

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If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

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-What's a real anti joke? -This.

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chuck norris is meeeeean to pain.

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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http://www.fotokristall.narod.ru/mov0001.swf

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Hey, Max!!

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. To get to the other side.

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Knock Knock Come in

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What did the fish say when it hit the wall? "Dam."

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Two strangers are sitting at a bar having a drink. One is a young, fat, red-headed guy named Fred. The other is an elderly grey-haired man. After a while, Fred turns to the old man and awkwardly asks: "Excuse me sir would ya' mind givin me some advice? There's this girl who has sat next to me on the bus every morning for the past three months. She's the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She always smiles and winks at me. I wannna ask her on a date but every time I go to do it I freeze. I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm falling for this girl and I don't know what in the world to do. Any tips?" The old man continues to sit quietly, slowly sipping his drink. After a while the old man looks at Fred. "Hmmm" says the old man, as he thinks over Fred's question. "What is your name son?" He asks Fred. "It's Fred sir," replies Fred. "Hmmm," the old man says again as he continues to think over Fred's question. The old man then stands up, takes out a gun, and shoots Fred in the face. Fred never saw it coming.

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What ticks like a clock and has numbers on it? A clock.

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Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

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co jo kurwa tocza?

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Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

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Why did the girl cross the road? She didn't. Well, she tried but when she was halfway there, she was hit by a bus and had to be rushed to the hospital.

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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Jay Leno: The economy is so bad.. Audience: how bad is it?! Jay Leno: Very bad.

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Wats a joke?

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What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

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What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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