What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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A fat boy walked into a party

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Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

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What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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Two women were sitting together, quietly.

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Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

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A man forgets to hang his food in a tree on a camping trip. A bear comes and kills his wife and two kids but leaves the man to live with the guilt for the rest of his life.

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

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In soviet Russia - some people were poor.

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Someone told me about this website.

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So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

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are you lazy? -yes -Why are u lazy? -cause am lazy

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

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Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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Why did Adele suck the doctors dick? LOL, did you think the doctor really got her to open her mouth all the time so he could "look at her sick throat"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops