What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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Good.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at rhyming Refrigerator.

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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c+t+c?

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why did the baby die? It was born with cancer

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What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

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If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

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Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

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Are you from Nebraska? 'Cuz you're the only ten i see.

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What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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