Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

Boobs are nasty!

Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

What's white and very boney? A bone

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

ruddell and dodds anal

Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

Do you know the Muffin Man? Of course you don't, faggot.

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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