Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because dead people cannot go to balls.

Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

Once upon a time there was a kid he was happy The End

What did the priest say to the young African American male? Good to see you again Robert. That community service we did at Morris Park last Friday should give a real boost to the infrastructure of the already stellar community we live in.

What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

There's a fair in a small town in Scotland. In this fair is a sheep judging contest. There are 3 sheep lined up for judging. The judge looks at the first sheep and says "Wow! This is the most beautiful sheep I've ever seen! This sheep just might win!" Then he proceeds to the second sheep. He says "This sheep is even more beautiful than the first! This sheep just might win!" Then he goes to the third sheep. He says "UGH! This is the ugliest most disgusting sheep I've ever seen! There is no way this sheep will win this contest!" And the sheep looks up at him and says, "You think I'm ugly? Well I'm not."

A spanish man, a french man and an italian man sat at a pub. And they realise no one can speak english properly.

Q:what do you call a black bunny with five eyes? A: i don't know I have never heard of such a thing

Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

C.U.M. on guys, gay jokes arent funny

Guess what?? What? I murdered your mother with a slimy piece of ham.

How do you stop a fridge from making contact with the ground? Cut its cable's ground pin.

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What happened to the boy who got everything he ever wanted? He turned into a gluttonous and greedy adult who eagerly spent all of his money and subsequently died alone.

Knock. Knock. Who's There? Its Jim, is Craig home? No he moved out sorry.

When Rocky teased Johnny by saying : 'Your momma is so fat , she looks like a hippo.' , He did not know Johnny's mother was suffering a terminal glandular problem combined with an agressive cancer..

Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

What do you call a blonde with one leg? Heather Mills

How did the baby cross the road? The baby got stapled to a chicken

How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens have short memories and no motivations other than food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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