A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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Go away.

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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A man walks into a bar. End of story.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

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Pianca going ham

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

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why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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Whats funnier than a real joke? An anti joke

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WNBA

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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Fuck her

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How many Chinese men people does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Anyone can screw in a light bulb, regardless of race or gender.

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What did the aids patient do after he was diagnosed? He had sex with many more people and gave them aids as well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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