Dani Barton = Stupid

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My dad beats my mom At checkers

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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Why didn't the man win the lottery? Because his lottery numbers weren't drawn.

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What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

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An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

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a man walks into a bar several people leave as they can see the potential danger in the situation. - the man (also so known as a hippo) was Matt Ross

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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A Christian, a Jew, and a Hindu walked into a bar - guess what happened then? Well two of them are alcoholics so they wisely changed their minds and left, then the other one got bored so he left too.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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So one time this woman was learning...

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whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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