What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

Black Poeple

Why did the plane full of Arabs crash? One of The engines failed

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

Chuck Norris is a normal man.

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

AROUND

BIG PENIS

A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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