I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Q: Playstation 4 or Xbox One? A: Both of them are specialized desktop computers used to play video games. It makes no sense to argue or attempt to make any distinction, as they are the exact same thing.

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops