One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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