What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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Ruller

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

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Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

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blubber vaginass CC

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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