If life throws you lemons Catch them

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A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

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Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

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what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

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womens rights

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

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What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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A scottish man having fun

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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A man is on anti jokes, he is not laughing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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