How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

How do you make a car? You build it.

what do ninjas and gay people have in common... if you eat them they will no longer be alive

What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

You know what they call men who make kitchen jokes? Single.

Q.why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A. because he was dead.

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

Chlamydia

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. But if you answered poop you aren't wrong.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

Y u do dis?

tee hee

Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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